My daughter Mignon is 34 years old. She was an exceptional student and captained her sports teams at school, became Vice Head girl of her school and won the headmasters award. She then went to University and passed her degree majoring in Industrial psychology and Political Science.
At the age of 23 she decided that she wanted to be the first women to cross Africa on a horse on the 30 degree parallel. This involved crossing through big five territory (Lion, Elephant, Buffalo, Leopard, and Cheetah)
We as parents were frantic with worry and noticed that the planning was not properly done. She was not thinking things through. Nothing would stop her from doing this expedition. Something was wrong but we put it to being young. She raised all the funding for the trip herself with no assistance. She approached a charity called Reach for a Dream which enables terminal children to make a wish and all the proceeds went to this charity. The trip was hell. Lions chased her on the horse, she got lost in the desert but she just would not give up.
Her father and I flew up to Botswana to look for her and found her in the middle of the African bush. She looked depressed and not really in touch with things. We begged her to return and finish the trip at a later stage, but she refused and after many months finished what she started.
When she returned we sent her to a doctor who told us that there was nothing wrong with her and the problem was with us as her parents.
The years went on and our relationship with her became dysfunctional. I just could not understand what was going on with her and started to think that she was involved with drugs.
What was so sad is that I judged her and presumed she was on drugs. She started drinking excessively and this made me even more disappointed in her. I never really listened to her as I thought that I knew what was wrong. Mental illness was something I chose not to accept. My child was just too clever to have any form of mental problems. How ignorant I was and how much damage I caused this innocent girl.
At age 32 she went into a psychosis and she was diagnosed. Once I understood what was going on I realized that she could not help what was happening to her.
I prayed every day for God to forgive me and forgive her and give me the wisdom to deal with each day as it came.
We got our daughter back by putting her first, loving her and accepting that it is okay to have a disability. There is very little she can’t do that other people can do and we don’t use the term “normal” people because what is normal? Some people have diabetes is that normal?
Mignon has moved on in such a determined way and has moved into her own home a few months ago with much excitement and got a publishing job that involves hectic dead lines and is determined to control her disability and not let the disability control her. She wants to live a full healthy happy life, with a little bit of luck and lots and lots of family support I believe she will.
I love her and have a deep respect for her, because it takes courage to go through what she is going through.
May God be with all of the people in need and may the families get the wisdom to understand, because this love and understanding will make the task of living so much easier as they move forward in a wonderful positive direction.
Grateful Mom
